Do you think laundry is sad and boring? You just don't know how to have sex on a washing machine! We conducted a special operation and stole the lost sex manual.
Everyone has a washing machine, from bachelors to respectable family men. But no one knows exactly how to have sex using a washing machine.
The first washing machine put into production was created by William Blackstone in 1874. In 1937, Bendix introduced the fully automatic washing machine. During this time, washing machines have undergone numerous improvements, but almost every manual has been issued explaining in detail its operation.
Modern instructions (manuals) are very thick and contain a lot of useful information. You can sometimes find ridiculous advice in them: "Do not wash cats" or "Do not put any of the people in the washing machine." But really useful things, like using a washing machine for sex, are not discussed.
Pick up any men's or women's magazine and each of them will advise you to have sex on the washing machine! But the instructions for the washing machine do not say how it can be used for sex.
There is a legend that such an instruction existed, but was later lost. Over time, washing machine manufacturers remembered about it, but did not include it in order to avoid numerous lawsuits from lovers of extreme sex.
One of the secret copies of the sex instructions was kept in the Italian city of Porcia, where the Zanussi factory is located. Our men's magazine MENSBY. COM decided to correct the injustice and steal the secret instructions from the company's office. We've enlisted one of the best industrial spies on the planet to take part in a covert special operation. Together with Jackie Chan, we did it and now we are in a hurry to share it with you!
Do you think laundry is sad and boring? You just don't know how to have sex on a washing machine! How to have sex on a washing machine?
Sex - instructions for washing machine
Vibration in sex works wonders. If you try to use the washing machine, while it is running, for sex, both will be satisfied.
Sex positions can be different. It is possible for a man to sit on the washing machine himself, and for his partner to take a position on top. Then the man will be like a real "vibrator". But you can put the partner herself on the washing machine, and the man can take a seat next to her. The washing machine is suitable for the rear position. The girl needs to be laid with her breast on the washing machine, and you yourself should stand behind the girl.
When should you have sex? Not while washing. It is recommended at this time to indulge in foreplay, and not sex itself. This should be done not on the machine itself, but nearby. And when to have sex? You should wait until the spin mode. That's when you can climb onto the washing machine.
If it was not possible to achieve orgasm in one push-up, then the washing machine repeats it again later.
The real and only correct instructions for sex on the washing machine here and now!
How to have sex on a washing machine?
Up to 600 rpm - low spin for delicate fabrics and delicate people. This is the sex mode for romantics and sensual natures.
600 rpm - medium-intensive spin for delicate fabrics. Suitable for relaxed and leisurely sex.
800 rpm - intensive spin for cotton laundry. This mode is for people with an active sexual position and those who like it hot.
1000 rpm - Strong spin for coarse fabrics. Sex will come out harder than usual. It will be rough and brutal sex (magazine recommendation!).
1200-1600 rpm - the strongest spin. Hardcore! For real animal sex!
It may happen that your girlfriend exclaims at the moment of sex: “To hell with him with underwear! Turn on 1600 rpm. Let's goeeeeeeeeee!"
Now you understand why your washing machine needs as many turns as possible? Don't forget to "wash your laundry" on the weekend!