What is the basis of the sympathy of the people around you? To please other people, you need to follow only four simple rules.
Viktor Sheinov writes: “A compliment is a slight exaggeration of the dignity that the interlocutor wants to see in himself.”
“A compliment is universal. You can compliment everyone. In the technique of turning inside out, even any flaw can become the ground for a compliment. ” A coward can be called experienced and cautious, a talker - eloquent, a boor - a shirt-guy...
To make a compliment hit on the spot, look for the partner's shortcomings. He was always scolded for these shortcomings, you will be the first to praise.
In order to make a compliment out of flattery, after the pseudo-complimentary part, you need to complain about the lack of this quality in yourself. Recall one of the well-known rules: “The compliment has an exceptional power in creating a good mood and, accordingly, the disposition of the interlocutor towards you, which, by the way, is more effective against the shining background of the anti-compliment to yourself.” That is, the background works not only in accusation, but also in praise...
“Oh, I am fascinated by the way you listen carefully! I run into one of the pretty listeners. “I rarely manage to concentrate like that…”
“Oh, how punctual you are! I throw to the last of the latecomers this morning. “But something will always delay me...”
“Oh, how good you look! — this is for our Miss Training. “And I’m falling down from fatigue...” To turn a compliment into flattery, you need to deprive it of reliance on facts. The absence of a factual basis makes the compliment unconvincing and reduces the statement to the level of banal flattery.
I am angry with the smiles worked out by the endless repetition of someone else's word "cheese". These are other people's smiles! A person who lives in our country should be taught to smile, stretching not “cheese”, but native “cheese”. You don’t have to adopt other people’s smiles, but practice your own!
The most important word is the person's name. He does not react to any other word as sensitively as to his own name. Realizing this is very important when dealing with people. The basis of success is friendliness, harmony and trust. The ability to create a pleasant, trusting atmosphere begins with the ability to correctly address the interlocutor. That is why the memory of names is so incredibly important. Pay attention to how you talk to people. Use the pronouns “you”, “you”, “we” or the name of the interlocutor in a conversation. It is a cardinal sin to forget the name of someone you have already dated. On this basis, a person immediately unconsciously notes that interest in his person is not too great. Everyone painfully perceives that his name has been forgotten. Name memory is very important. She can be trained. Pronouncing the name of a person correctly, we touch the most intimate strings of his soul. So be careful with names.
Recognition of significance
Demonstrating recognition of the importance of the interlocutor is one of the important points of the “rule of four pluses”. Words can be anything:
- I know: only you can help me. “I just can't do without your recommendation.- Probably no one but you has such experience. Please advise how can I best submit this proposal to the director?
Based on the materials of A. Derevitsky "Hunting for a buyer"