Carter Lowe Creator, entrepreneur, and self-care advocate
Reading time: 15 min

How to become an interesting person for others

From time to time, every person has a desire to become interesting to others. It would be good at this time to ask yourself a question: “Why do I need this?” After all, it is important to understand where the roots of this desire come from. Why do you need someone else's approval?

Yes, we are social animals first and foremost. In order to calibrate our worth, we need to somehow be reflected in the eyes of other people. If you are interesting to others, then self-esteem flies up. If no one pays attention to you, you start to feel uncomfortable.

Consider the ways and qualities by which you will be able to become someone who will arouse the interest of others.

Knowledge

Without this, the ship will not sail. Of course, if you count on the attention of worthy people, and not a gang of frostbitten teenagers in the yard. You will have to study, read the news in order to understand what is happening around, what is the situation in your country at the moment, to have an idea about such things as the economy, politics, modern technologies and more. It is also important to read books regularly to enrich your vocabulary and be able to keep up a conversation. There is also a lot of literature on the topic of emancipation and psychological techniques in order to attract attention.

It is better to be friends with a computer, as modern realities suggest that you are on a short footing with technology. It will also make you popular, because many people have problems with the Internet, programs and setting up their hardware. How many families were formed from the invitation to "reinstall Windows"? Remember this too. Girls love smart men.

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Hobbies

It would be nice to have a rare hobby in which you are well versed. For example, you are crazy about yachts and you know everything about their structure and the art of managing ships. This will make your knowledge unique. Therefore, try to choose an occupation for yourself to which you can devote a lot of free time and dive headlong into the subtleties of your hobby. There will definitely be those who are burning with the same cause, and you will gain popularity and even find friends in your area of ​​​​interest.

Show interest yourself

Perhaps you are not interested in anyone because you do not leave the house. Either you visit only the place of work, and then you rush to spend time playing computer games or you take work home. But, as you know, you won’t earn all the money, and if you don’t leave the apartment, you won’t create a family. So get moving, you're not a tree. Try to go at least to a corporate party and chat with colleagues. If that doesn't interest you, go outside, to a park, or somewhere where a lot of people gather.

Learn from life

The most valuable thing is to learn not from your own, but from the mistakes of others. Anyone can become a wise teacher without even realizing it. It will be not only an exploration of the diversity of manifestations of the human character, but also an invaluable experience without loss. Of course, what you have learned, having received your bumps, is more effective. Use it to make yourself better and stronger.

Get a dog

If you do not want to leave the room, as Comrade Brodsky advised, then get yourself a four-legged friend. First, you will definitely arouse his interest. Secondly, you will have to go outside with the dog. And there are other dog lovers out there. There are also quite attractive mistresses of animals. Maybe it's fate?

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Try online dating

If you really want to get your dose of endorphins and raise your self-esteem, install the dating app like Tinder and scroll through the offer feed. Perhaps likes and messages from potential partners will please you, and you will be able to tell about yourself, causing a reciprocal interest. And there and before the meeting in reality is not far away. There will be even more opportunities to express yourself.

Become a teacher

If your desire to arouse the interest of others is so great, then try to get an education related to coaching. It could be anything. For example, a passion for sports can develop into the fact that you will become a real coach. Just don't forget to take fitness coaching courses and at least additional sports nutrition classes before that. You will have clients who will not only be interested in your beautiful sculpted body, but also listen to you, because for them you are a storehouse of secret knowledge about muscle structure, diet and training, and how to become like you.

Make people talk about you

Outrageous. Fashion. Style. Allow yourself to become someone like Bond or Lagerfeld, in a word, someone who has his own special style. Choose your ideal image, thought out to the details and match it every day, every hour. Obviously, you can not copy anyone. Create yourself and stick to the plan. People will definitely pay attention to you and remember the unusual appearance. But it is better if a person truly worthy of attention is hidden under this image. The one who has achieved something, and not just dressed stylishly.

Stow Kelly, Unsplash

Try psychotherapy

Tactics and techniques, of course, are good. But 10 sessions with a psychotherapist will have a much better effect on your condition and attitude. Discuss with the therapist everything that worries you, and focus on your problem. Perhaps you will understand where the desire to please everyone comes from. Just do not dive into children's resentment and blaming parents. You have grown up and should be responsible for your own behavior. Your parents raised you the best they could. The fact that you are now dissatisfied with life and clamped is your problem.

Relax

If you constantly think about how to become an interesting person, you will go crazy with the effort. Relax and don't jump out of your pants. Have a cocktail, compliment the girl at the next table in the cafe, smile and be at ease. The state of tension is very felt by others. Do what calms you. Listen to your favorite music before you go to a meeting where you have to show off.

Train your sense of humor

A witty person will never be alone in the company. Just keep in mind, people love pranksters, but not clowns. If you fool around like a clown and make greasy bearded jokes, you will quickly ruin your reputation. For training, try to read fresh jokes, sites with humorous stories will also work. Pay attention to the comments under the posts that get a lot of likes. Try to figure out what people like and what makes them happy.

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Be easy going

Do not be like those who promise to come to a party and stay at home with chips front of the TV. He said "yes" - go ahead, act! Discover the quality of spontaneity and see how your life will change with it. Being open and positive will give others the impression that you are a positive person, and they may instinctively begin to gravitate toward you. Take advantage of this and make new friends.

Learn to take off. Sitting on the Internet and saw a stunningly beautiful beach in the picture? Or maybe mountains? Take a vacation or sick leave, buy a ticket and fly. This will help you get rid of insecurities and feel like you are taking life into your own hands.

Start Instagram and post interesting pictures

Don't forget about smart posts. If you paid attention to the advice to read books, then you can write some fascinating sentences under the picture. If not, better not be embarrassed. Try to upload photos that will talk about an interesting, not a dull life. The easiest way to gain popularity is when you travel a lot. You will immediately have a lot of subscribers and good friends. So you can become quite popular in a very short time and even find fellow travelers for adventures.

Just take really good pictures. If you don’t know how to shoot, there are free training courses on the Internet, and you can hire a copywriter to write interesting posts.

Gabriella Clare Marino, Unsplash

Lead others

If you find yourself in a noisy motley crowd, take courage and try to rally the people. Introduce people to each other, show interest in everyone in turn. Find fun ideas that everyone will love. It can be mass games: cards, bowling, monopoly or mafia.

Do not think that you alone want to interest everyone. Maybe others are just shy. Be bold and get your way.

Do not play the role of a victim of circumstances

It is very easy to blame everything on fate, say that you are lonely because of external reasons, complain about life and whine about everything. But, as they say, if everyone around is not the same, look inside yourself. If you think that by arousing pity you will win sympathy, then in the end you will be very disappointed. You will only be considered a sufferer and your victims will no longer be evaluated.

According to research, an interesting person for others is one who lives according to his own choice. Just understand that your suffering affects only you, and no one else (except your mother, but you are not 5 years old anymore). So stop complaining about your bitter fate and moaning about your fate.

Learn to get your way

A person is designed in such a way that he gets used to almost any circumstances. But only experience can change it and make it truly interesting. Just imagine how fruitful life will be if you stop feeling insecure at every step. How to do it? Just a jump right off the bat. Fear is fought only by attacking it.

Don't worry if you do it at the cost of a little disturbance. This does not mean that you have to break the law. Learn to start at least be able to ask the store to replace stale goods with fresh ones. Demand at first a little more than what is needed, so that later you can easily and successfully take what is rightfully due to you. You can be persistent and at the same time evoke sympathy from others. You don't even need to be rude for this.

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Stop taking everything seriously. And this life too

Let yourself go. Try to have fun and have fun. Look at life as if from the outside and imagine that this is a game, a kind of experiment in which you will not lose anything. No, this does not mean that you can jump off the roof and throw yourself under the car. There are many more interesting and exciting things in life. You can imagine it as a minefield that you need to walk slowly and carefully, or you can imagine that you are constantly waiting for new experiences that will enrich and shape the new you.

At the end of the journey, you will realize that the behavior and attitude of those around you, whose attention you so much want to achieve, is determined to a greater extent by your behavior towards them. It is you who is the source of their reaction and therefore you can regulate it.

Tell people what you think, not what they want to hear

Do you want to be interesting or helpful? Break your chains and dare to tell others what you think. You will feel freedom. At first it will be her sweet aftertaste, but do not stop and you will feel it to the fullest.

We usually don't tell people the truth because we want to be nice and we're afraid of being disappointed. We are afraid of being rejected. That is why we lie and live not the way we want, but to please others. Maybe it’s enough to make another effort on yourself and stop meeting expectations? Do you understand that no one is forcing you to do this? So leave this useless initiative.

It is impossible to become interesting, being afraid to disappoint everyone and everyone. Usually the result is a brazen attitude, as if obeying others is a duty. But this is not the norm. Freedom attracts people. And it must be within us. Stop thinking that someone should let you be free. Allow yourself to do it yourself and people will be drawn to you.

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Try to act provocatively

others think about you. Try, for example, to do three things every day that are uncharacteristic for you. Not necessarily something global. Just understand that you are alive and have the right to make mistakes or unusual actions (which do not harm others). Realize that by such actions your ties with others will not be severed. You will only free your life from unnecessary people and attract into it those who are close to you in spirit.

Don't compare yourself with others

This one had a busy life at the start, he lives on travels.… What difference does it make what someone does? Turn your focus inward. Everyone is different and constant comparison can drive you crazy. Work with what is given and solve the equation of your own life. Yes, there is always someone prettier, smarter and much more interesting than you. So what? For those who need you, it won't matter. Stop cultivating complexes in yourself.

Work and constantly learn new things

As long as you have a job, you are interesting to others. An unemployed person has no money of his own and does not move forward. To always stay young, smart and interesting, you need to learn new things and develop. Studying makes you erudite and your mind flexible. Do not get hung up on one thing, improve your skills, hone your skills. This will at least make you an interesting and valuable employee.

Don't be shy

Being shy makes it impossible for you to do what you really want. What does it matter what people think of you? Life is too short. Do whatever you want. What will you say to yourself on your deathbed? Too shy to be myself? There may not be a second chance. That is why it is worth in any controversial situation to pull yourself together and do what confuses you the most.

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Love yourself

An elementary phrase that confuses many people. But what makes you think that you will be interesting to others if you are not even able to accept and love yourself? Do not let anyone treat you badly, otherwise you yourself will lose respect for yourself. Self-love includes taking care of your body, style, diet, bedtime, and more. This is self-development and the ability to forgive yourself for mistakes, failures and breakdowns. Try using affirmations from time to time. These are phrases that inspire and create a special mood. It could be something like, "I can do it" or "I deserve everything I want to have." Be tolerant of your weaknesses, because everyone is not perfect. Learn to draw conclusions and move on.

Learn the language of gestures and emotions

As in the old popular series “Lie to me”, Dr. Lightman “read people” using sign language, so you can use the same method to attract people to you. Try to understand the interlocutor by copying his gestures. Enter his inner world. Our movements are a reflection of our thoughts and emotions. Get into his shoes, try to think like him and talk like him. This will make it easier to understand others. This will win you over, and it will not be difficult to set up feedback. Here you will see how a person will be interested in you. Just try not to copy it defiantly and stupidly. Synchronize with ease and keep in mind that empty repetition is not enough. Wish to understand a person, then you will achieve this.

Do not be afraid of change, it is life itself

People are afraid of change and most often try to stay in place, even if they do not like the status quo. Going out into the light, taking a step away from the familiar environment usually scares us. Many live in their comfortable corner, not realizing that this only makes them uninteresting to anyone. So it is impossible to put plans into practice, because life is a continuous movement. Only the dead and yogis in the "corpse pose" are motionless. By changing, you will be able to evolve and make new acquaintances.

In trying to become interesting to someone, do not forget about the most important person for whom you should be interesting - yourself. The rest are not so important. Staying in harmony with yourself, it is much easier to attract attention.