How to answer the question "How are you?": 350 witty and beautiful answers.

Is it easy to quickly and wittyly answer the question: “How are you?”, which often begins most everyday dialogues? It's easy if you prepare ahead of time and keep a few great options in mind. Especially for you, we have prepared a list of possible and varied answers to the question about you, your affairs.

— Hello, how are you? How are you? - Everything is fine. Is it boring!? In this article, you will surely find an interesting and witty option for yourself on how to answer the question “How are you?” Just choose any of the answers and go. Answers can be unexpected, funny, sharp, impudent, strange, choose according to the situation what suits you.

How to answer the standard questions of the interlocutor: “How are you?”, “How are you?”, “How are you?”

Surprise your interlocutor by giving an unexpected and original answer to a banal question: “How are you?” Are you too cool or simply tired to simply answer the question: “How are you?” and wait for the next question about business, and indeed about your life. Choose interesting and suitable answers for yourself to breathe fresh air into everyday conversations with a girl or a guy. And maybe this conversation will lead you to something new.

On the phone, at a meeting, in social networks with acquaintances, unfamiliar and unfamiliar people, almost always any conversation begins with the words: “How are you?”, “How are you?”, “How are you?”. And answering the question: “How are you?”, You can surprise and attract the attention of a person, you can politely and without a mat stop further conversation, but with some people only sarcasm will help.

Our non-standard answers to the question: “How are you?” will help brighten up the conversation with any interlocutor.

How interesting and original to answer the banal question: “How are you?”

Every day we answer the questions of men, women: “How are you?”, “How are you?” in correspondence, at a meeting, at work and on the street. Sometimes you want to answer, beautiful, sometimes original, sometimes witty, and sometimes even bold.

If you want to be the one who quickly and witty answers the questions: “How are you?”, “How are you?” and “How are you?”, then this list is for you.

1. Looking at the grass from above... I'm definitely having a good day.

2. If I had a tail, I would wag it already!

3. Like damp salt… I don't get enough sleep.

4. Let's go. Next question.

5. Shh! I can't tell you this in front of witnesses.

6. I want to ask you for money.

7. Enemies attack, but you can not give up.

8. I heard that I'm doing well.

9. To answer this question, I need to go back about 10 years. Are you sure you have free time?

10. I take from life everything that is possible and a drop of what is impossible.

11. Satisfied (-yna), like an elephant after bathing.

12. In short: my parents are not ashamed.

13. This morning I was going to take over the world, but I overslept. I had to postpone!

14. Can you ask a simpler question?

15. If I had been better, it would have been a sin.

16. Can't complain... I've tried, but no one listens.

17. If I was better, I would take vitamins.

18. Trying to change my basic configuration settings.

19. No substantiated complaints.

20. I feel so good that I have to sit on my hands in order not to clap my hands.

21. Well, I have a rash on my left buttock. Continue?

22. Donated blood just today to check it out. I'll let you know as soon as I get the result.

23. Kiss me and I will immediately feel better.

24. Same as last time.

25. If I tell, I will have to liquidate as an unnecessary witness.

26. Well, I haven't had my coffee yet and no one has been hurt, so for now, not bad.

27. I am being treated for swine flu/COVID.


28. Odd - smart (-on), even - handsome (-a).

29. Good question.

30. One step ahead of those who are not breathing.

31. Can't complain! This is against our company policy.

32. Definitely good.

33. Better than a minute ago because you're here.

34. I am too lazy to answer such questions.

35. Was fine until you asked.

36. I can't complain... but sometimes I do complain.

37. I would feel much better if you had already asked me out on a date.

38. There are many opinions about this. What is yours..?

39. There is always room for improvement.

40. Better than I can be. I hope you're on top too.

41. Waiting for my problems to go away.

42. On top of the world.

43. Awesome, but I can handle it.

44. Minding my own business!

45. Armed and ready for anything!

46. I dance to the rhythm of life. Too bad the bear stepped on your ear.

47. The doctor said that I would live.

48. Already a millionaire and lying all the time.

49. Do you want the short version or the long version?

50. I'll leave this answer to your imagination.

51. Can you ask a better question?

52. I'm fine... or is it my antidepressants?

53. Thinking out a way to retreat.

54. Everything is going according to plan.

55. My psychiatrist advised me not to discuss this with others.

56. They told me that you would ask me about it (in a whisper).

57. Trying to be alone.

58. I am fully prepared for the end of the world.

59. Damn, can you see me?!

60. Nice try.

61. I can still.

62. Wife/Husband says I'm fine.

63. I have a pulse, so everything is fine with me.

64. The voices in my head are telling me NOTHING to say (in a whisper).

65. Compared to whom exactly?

66. I am what I should be at this moment in all universes of the multiverse.

67. Handsome.

68. I'll leave it up to you.

69. How am I? Happy (s), like a mongrel chasing a cat.

70. I promised myself that I would kill the next person who asks me this question... but I like you, so I will let you live.

71. Traveling… through the vicissitudes of life.

72. What about me? Let's talk about you!

73. Like a tumbleweed.

74. Terrible. But thanks for asking.

75. Good enough.

76. I don't know, I should ask my doctor, I pay him enough.

77. I hunt dragons. And you?

78. I can't know.

79. Better than some, but not as good as others.

80. Not bad. But it could be better, like payday.

81. Throw a coin, you will get an answer.

82. So… it came to this (thoughtfully).

83. Finally! You see me!?!?!

84. When you are around, everything is fine.

85. Fine, unless you're going to shoot me.

86. If I had been better, no one would have stood me up!

87. Trust me, you don't want to know.

88. I turn oxygen into carbon dioxide.

89. Overworked and underpaid.

90. One foot on ice, the other on a banana peel!

91 It could be worse - I could (-la) be you (for brothers and sisters).

92. Like a dog in a Chinese restaurant.

93. Still breathing, so I'm fine.

94. Bright to partly cloudy.

95. Well, since my name was not in today's obituaries.

96. Minding my own business. You should try this.

97. How are you?

98. Thank you for asking (s), although you can judge for yourself (s).

99. I would say that I have a score of 9,999 out of 10.

100. My lawyer says I don't have to answer the question, "How are you?".

101. You will be the first to answer, and we will compare.

102. I'm pretty sure I don't have to tell you.

103. Is curiosity not a vice?

104. Every day is better than the next.

105. I'm still single, in case you're wondering.

106. It's better now that I'm talking to you.

107. I live like in a dream. Please don't wake me up.

108. So far so good, but there is still time for things to go wrong.

109. Trying to move on, thanks. And you?

110. Still in bed (answering the phone).

111. Suspiciously close to a fairy tale.

112. Terrible, but at least I'm used to it (-la).

113. Good enough to talk to you if you want.

114. I can't complain, nobody listens to me anyway.

115. I now try to avoid ambiguous questions.

116. Thinking about how I can defeat you.

117. Yesterday I went to Gucci and today I went to Prada.

118. Do you really want to know? (Squint)

119. The body is here, but the mind is on vacation.

120. Are you an English teacher?

121. Better than nothing.

122. And what to answer the question when you are not okay?

123. I shed my old skin.

124. Trying to find a way to get rid of you.

125. I'm better on the inside than on the outside.

126. All is well, unless you have infected me with pathogenic microbes by airborne droplets (gloomy voice).

127. I think I'm fine. What do you think I'm doing?

128. I have never been better.

129. Stable… ups and downs.

130. I'm happy!

131. I'll let you know when I find out.

132. I was fine until you asked me this question.

133. Much better than I deserve!

134. Like you, but better.

135. What do you think I am?

136. I don't have a gun in my mouth, so I think I'm fine.

137. I live a life of denial and repressed anger.

138. Like on a hot frying pan.

139. So far so good!

140. Not bad for a crazy old lady.

141. Maybe one day you will be lucky and you will know.

142. I waste my time answering stupid questions.

143. I have no way of knowing.

144. Not very well, but I plan to lie.

145. Like a pig in a butcher shop.

146. I am the force against which you cannot resist.


148. Well, I'm still alive.

149. I'm better than I was, but not nearly as good as I'm going to be.

150. My body is out of sorts today.

151. I need peace and quiet.

152. Getting better every second.

153. Not quite yet.

154. Do you really care?


155. Really awful, thanks for asking.

156. Somewhere between the best and the best.

157. I support the work of my organs.

158. Much better when you're here.

159. I'm sexy as hell.

160. Happy and satisfied, thank you.

161. I'm doing a little better than before, but not as well as I would like.

162. I'm not sure yet.

163. [Carry gibberish].

164. What a cheeky question to ask a guy/girl! Hmmm.

165. I'm very cute, but what about you?

166. Physically? Emotionally? Financially? It's not clear what you mean.

167. Much better… although still bad.

168. I try not to burst into tears. I get an A for effort, right?

169. Do you really care?

170. It was worse.

171. Pulse, temperature, tests are normal.

172. Trying to be helpful.

173. Not as good as you.

174. I say what I think, and therefore I am silent.

175. Nothing special.

176. I would be lying if I said everything was fine.

177. At least there is a lot of room for improvement!

178. Compared to what?

179. Incredibly handsome.

180. I don't know... Is it still Friday?

181. How do you want me to be?

182. On a scale of one to a punch in the face?

183. Not very good. Does it bother you? Do you want to talk about it?

184. For what purpose are you interested? (suspiciously)

185. I don't know, you tell me how I'm doing now?

186. I imagine my life somewhere on a fabulous beach.

187. Don't ask, it's too early to tell.

188. As always.

189. Good enough to chat if you like.

190. Imagine having an amazing vacation.

191. Just give me a hug and we'll stop there.

192. What do you want?

193 Well, you're looking at me.

194. Like in a crypt… everything is quiet and calm.

195. Meditating… I am calm (-yna) (slowly, drawing out the words).

196. I think it's better than nothing.

197. Good enough, I suppose.

198. It could have been better… it could have been worse.

199. Remove me from your friends.

200. I hope not as well as I will soon.

201. I live my life.

202. Just answering stupid questions.

203. Let me think about it and I'll get back to you.

204. One day closer to my rest.

205. I'm as pretty as I look.

206. What a bold question!

207. Like that violinist on the sinking Titanic who said to the rest of the musicians, "Gentlemen, I am honored to play with you today."

208. No comment.

209. As might be expected under present conditions.

210. If I had it better, I would be (s) you.

211. I am still upright and breathing.

212. Alive and well (s).

213. It gets better every minute.

214. I enjoy life.

215. It's much better when you're here with me.

216. I would say that I am [insert number] out of 10.

217. All is calm in Baghdad.

218. Should I answer a question?

219. If it were better for me, I would hire you to be happy with me.

220. My abilities are shocked by my needs, but it should be the other way around.

221. Do you want an honest or truthful answer?

222. Shiny, like a new brass whistle.

223. Feeling worse now that you asked.

224. National average.

225. Mom is happy.

226. I'll tell you after a strong hug.

227. Like a dying swan.

228. When do you need an answer?

229. Great!

230. Stop being so curious.

231. Much better when you asked.

232. I have heard a lot of good things, but you should never listen to all the rumors.

233. By your prayers.

234. Excellent, and I hope that this status will continue.

235. Well, I woke up this morning in my bed. This is good?

236. Google it.

237. Why do you want to know?

238. I'm a little tired, but I think I'll survive. And you?

239. I remember to be patient.

240. No complaints, that's how good I am.

241. Fortunately, I am slowly but surely getting old.

242. Why do you ask? Are you a doctor?

243. As Descartes said: "I think, therefore I am."

244. A little worse than I deserve.

245. Like a sharp knife through butter.

246. Am I retiring today?

247. If it were better for me, I would be outside the law.

248. I’ll answer that it’s great - you won’t believe it, I’ll say that it’s bad - you won’t help.

249. May we start with a simpler question?

250. Too hard to answer.

251. Not today!

252. Well, I'm not dead yet (-la), so I think everything is fine.

253. What to say instead of "good" or "good."

254. Oh, it's good that you asked.

255. You don't want to know.

256. Now I seem to be under repair.

257. Shhh… too early to tell.

258. My cat is unhappy with me.

259. I hope not as well as I ever will.

260. How much will you pay me if I tell you?

261. Always busy.

262. If I were better, I would be you.

263. Make my dream come true.

264. It's better now that I can talk to you.

265. If it were better for me, it would already be illegal.

266. I fight crime.

267. Better than some, not as good as others.

268. No worse than before.

269. I hope for the future that awaits me.

270. I can't complain, but I'll try anyway.

271. Good enough.

272. Everything could be worse. I could (-la) be you.

273. I dance to the rhythm of life.

274. I think to survive.

275. Almost like you, but better.

276. Looking forward to the weekend.

277. I measure the distance between reality and expectation.

278. Well, at least I'm still alive.

279. How much are you willing to pay me if I tell?

280. Nothing special.

281. This is indeed a wonderful question. Ummm …

282. I feel happy!

283. Next question, please.

284. All is well… unless you have some contagious disease.

285. I'm sure you have this information on your screen.

286. It's a secret.

287. I live a life of repressed rage, emotional imbalance and denial of reality.

288. I live like in a dream… and half the time it's a nightmare.

289. I'm not quite sure yet.

290. It would be much better if you kissed me.

291. Strange and getting even weirder.

292. Nice try! Now, could you empty your pockets? I am sure that you stole my heart.

293. I try not to cry, but at least I get an A for my effort.

294. Hmmm… Do you have a minute? (smiling happily)

295. Happy and satisfied, thank you very much for asking.

296. Well, I have a strange itch on my ass…

297. Thank you for the question. You just made my day.

298. Unlike what?

299. How do I… what do I have to do with it? I don't understand…

300. Just hug me and leave everything as it is.

301. Everything is going well!

302. It's much better now that you're with me.

303. So far so good, but there is still time for things to get worse.

304. All right, I'm doing well.

305. Worse than the last time, but better than the next.

306. I live in dreams. You can join, there's plenty of room.

307. Fine, unless the weather makes other plans.

308. This is strictly classified information.

309. This is a really interesting question.

310. Terrible, but I'm used to it (-la).

311. Why?! Why?! What did they say about me??? (Speak suspiciously to everything and everyone!)

312. I kill old cells and create new ones.

313. I had ups and downs. Don't you have everything so bumpy?

314. Normal by itself, but the body needs vitamins.

315. All right, next question.

316. Bought new socks.

317. Armed and ready!

318. Somewhere between uh and eh.

319. What do you want?

320. Better than I was a minute ago because you are here now.

321. Harmful, but my eyes are beautiful.

322. Life is in full swing, but so far in the head.

323. Great, but I'll be even better!

324. Better than most, but perhaps not as good as others.

325. Life flies by with a whistle.

326. Nothing has changed since the last meeting, it's still good.

327. Would you like a few words? It happens... anything.

328. Like a cabriolet - steep and no roof.

329. Like in Greece, everything is there… except walnuts.

330. No time to explain.

331. I envy myself.

332. So far only flies/bees are valued.

333. Soon I will surrender.

334. When how. Always different.

335. Excellent, only stupid questions infuriate me.

336. I walk lightly through life.

337. Try to guess.

338. Excellent, one day is better than another.

339. Color and smell.

340. To be completely happy, I need to know how you are.

341. Is this a formal question or do you have free time?

342. Let's change the subject.

343. Health to you and happiness in your personal life.

344. Secret.

345. Excellent! I look forward to further inquiries about my personal life.

346. Nothing to upset/please you with.

347. Year of issue 1997. Light tan color. The headlights are blue/green/brown. The roof is in place, the body is not broken, the brakes are normal. I start with half a turn. Additional options can be installed. Documents on hand.

348. I'm like Coca-Cola, I know it's bad, but I like it.

349. Great, but no one is jealous yet.

350. I am preparing to take over the world.

The above list contains many non-standard and cool answers to the question: “How are you?”, It was asked, asked and will be asked to each other all the time. And the phrases listed above will help answer the question in an original and unexpected way. And how do you answer it?