Tired of old relationships and want a new girlfriend? Relationships often run out of steam, are not fun, or just get boring. How to beautifully break off relations with a girl in order to find yourself a new chick?
1. Do's and Don'ts
1.1 Don't end your relationship with a girl by text message, phone call or email. It's disrespectful. Your ex-future may get the impression that you are trying to avoid her. Find the strength to do it alone and in person.
You may not realize it, but there are many benefits to ending a relationship in person. On the one hand, this gives both partners the opportunity to discuss the situation. And even if it will be harder to do, then most likely the result will be less dramatic, which is of course good.
1.2 Don't put all the blame on your partner. Relationships are never easy. Be prepared to talk through your relationship without blaming anyone.
Perhaps, if you want it, you can find in your relationship the bad things that you brought into them. In an effort to be honest, don't make your ex-girlfriend feel like she's the only one responsible for the end of the relationship. Specify what could be changed to improve the relationship.
In some cases, the blame lies entirely with the other person. In that case, it's okay to talk about it. If your girlfriend cheated on you, used drugs, manipulated you, or openly disrespected you, you can blame her entirely.
This can cause conflict in many cases, so prepare for it. The upside is that if you are honest with yourself and with her about the reasons that caused the breakup, then this will give you a better chance in the future to find your true love. Isn't that what you both want?
1.3 Don't give your ex-girlfriend any hope. If you don't want to remain friends, don't leave opportunities for this. Find the right words to say it. Instead of saying, "By the way, I don't want us to be friends," say something like, "You know how important you are to me. I just don't think it's right for us to just be friends right after the breakup. I hope that in the future we will return to this issue.”
1.4 Don't talk. Tell mutual friends about the breakup carefully. Boasting or gossip can hurt your ex, who is already in a difficult emotional state. In addition, it can inspire your ex to spread gossip about you, and basically encourage her to do immature things.
Tell your close friends about the breakup, but don't spread the news to acquaintances and people you barely know. It's most likely a good idea to tell your close friend about what's going on between you and your ex. And it's probably not the best idea to post the news on a social media status or tell every girl in school that your relationship with your ex is history. This is bad tone.
1.5 Don't be petty. The meaning of the word petty is hard to pin down, but it usually includes the following definition: "Treat people the way you want to be treated." This is a proven golden rule.
Don't cheat on your ex before you break up with her. If a spark “ran through” between you and another girl, show decency - be patient a little. Think carefully about your feelings and end the relationship with your girlfriend before you start a new relationship. It will look decent for your ex and you will feel better.
Don't snub your girlfriend before the end of your relationship (better yet, don't treat her badly at all.). As long as this relationship is alive, you have obligations to the other person. If you feel like you can't or don't want to treat your girlfriend well, you should do everything to give her the opportunity to find someone who will treat her well.
2. What to do
2.1 Try to minimize heart pain. There is no chance that the other person will not be hurt. It's like taking off a bandage, if you take it off in one sharp motion, the pain will go away quickly, but if you do it slowly, you will just stretch the pain. You can help minimize heart pain in several ways:
Keep your distance from her. Even if you really don't want it, offer her a hug or other courtesy if you see that your ex needs it. Be reassuring, not selfish.
Find the right time for the break. Obviously, there is never a perfect time for this. But do not do this before a holiday, exam or vacation. Try to do this when both of you are not going to be seriously tested in the future.
Fight the urge to argue and bicker. When a relationship breaks up with someone, there is a high chance that this person will be angry. Don't fuel her anger by provoking her, arguing with her, or putting her down. Former partners often say too hurtful things when they swear.
2.2 Be prepared for your emotions. When you finally announce the breakup, you should be ready for it. You may experience sadness, anger, and even emptiness. It's completely normal to experience any of these emotions during a breakup. If you want to show your emotions, don't hide them. If you don't feel strong emotions, don't force them.
2.3 Be honest with her. It's the least she deserves. If you don't have a reasonable reason to end the relationship, consider the situation. Talk to your friends. The reason doesn't have to be perfect, but it has to be real. After all, you should give it to your ex-girlfriend.
Show her what you thought about the reason for the breakup and show facts to support your thoughts. Don't be aggressive. When you explain the reason for the breakup, don't talk about other relationships. Your relationship is just your relationship. And the rupture of one relationship has nothing to do with other relationships.
Be with her for as long as she needs. Do not run out the door immediately after the words "let's break up." Stay with her while she ponders the information, and answer any questions she may have. If you come back to the same question again and again, tell her about it.
2.4 Be reassuring. If necessary, let her know that she will be the perfect girl for someone else in the future. Tell me about what attracted you to her at the beginning and throughout your relationship. That way she won't feel terrible. This can add to her self-confidence, which is likely to be lowered by a gap.
2.5 If she has any new questions, offer to talk to her. Do not say that you are ready to meet and talk with her later, when the situation calms down a bit, only if you decide not to communicate after the breakup. This will give you both time to think and may help her feel like she always has the opportunity to "pour her heart out".
Wait a while before you start dating a new girl. Especially if you often run into an ex.Ask her if she still wants to be your friend. This way you can start a new beautiful friendship. Never say the phrase: "you are not to blame for anything, it is only my fault." Not feeling guilty about breaking up with a girl. If you delay the end of the relationship, it will only get worse. Don't make things worse by sending nasty messages or making rude phone calls. Put yourself in her place. Imagine that she left you. If you follow these rules, the process will be less painful for both of you. And maybe it will benefit you in the future. No matter how well you behave, the pain is the same. And she will be angry with you, no matter what you say or how well you behave. Don't talk to her for a few days after the breakup. After a few days, you can try to check on how she's doing to ease your guilt and see how she's coping with the breakup. But it can remind her of a lost relationship and keep her from moving forward. Remember that most people go through this situation with anger and depression. Anger is much more productive and will allow her to move forward. If you spot her with another guy, stay calm. Remember that it was you who broke up with her, and also that it's time for both of you to move on.